Is what you’ve been telling yourself about life, about your family, about your enemy, about why you haven’t achieved what you really want yet really true? Really?
Is it possible that you haven’t tried EVERY possible solution? It it possible that you didn’t try every diet? Is it possible that you haven’t read all the books on the subject to figure out a different way? It it possible that you didn’t attend all of the seminars that might hold the key to unlocking your future? Is it possible that if you REALLY wanted to you could spend more time with your loved ones and less time at work?
One of my favorite questions that I ask my lover and kids (which sometimes they don’t want to hear!) is, “If I put a gun to your head and said, I’m going to blow your brains out if you don’t find a way…, could you find one?”
I hear the excuses ALL THE FREAKIN’ TIME that “I can’t because… [name your story].” Because “I’m too old,” “I’m too young”, “I’m to fat,” “I’m to thin,” “I don’t have the time,” “I don’t have the money,” “My partner/spouse won’t let me,” “You don’t know what they did to me!” If there’s an opportunity, I love to ask them, “Is that really true.” Unfortunately most of the time it doesn’t seem appropriate or some people may not be ready for a real discussion.
But, if you’re reading this, then you’re probably willing to ask yourself the question.
“Is it really true” what you’ve been telling yourself about why you haven’t taken action to bring you your destiny, starting today? You may have had awful things happen to you. I get it. Those facts are true, but the story that you’ve been telling yourself about why that has stopped you from having/being/getting what you want, that’s the part that is NOT a fact and has become the fiction that you’ve hypnotized yourself into believing by telling it over and over and over again. That story has gives you the excuse of why you have not achieved/done/become/experienced what you truly want. The story gives us a ‘good reason’ why you haven’t had to face your real fear – that if you took action and didn’t achieve your results, people might not think you’re enough and if you’re not enough then you wouldn’t be loved.
Love (the desire of receiving) is the true need and desire that everyone has deep down. Acceptance, appreciation, recognition and a belief that we’re enough is one of the primary drivers of the human psyche. Why do bullies bully people? Because they want significance as a poor replacement for love that they’re not getting elsewhere. Why are people depressed (other than being selfish and thinking only of themselves and not others)? Absent a physical bodily malfunction it’s because they want to feel loved and are able to at least get attention through the vehicle of depression.
Getting back to the Question to get past this belief, this story of why you can’t, why you haven’t, why it’s impossible, why you’re overweight, why you’re unhappy, why you’re suffering – ask yourself:
Q1: IS THIS REALLY TRUE? Really? Is there ANY other possibility however slight?
Then ask:
Q2: How would you feel if you never had this thought? How excited, joyful and relieved would you feel if this belief or thought never existed in you?
If you never ever ever felt that “I’m not good enough,” “I’m this way because of him/her or that experience.” If you never felt “I don’t have the time,” “I don’t have the money,” “I can’t make it work.”
How would that feel?
Then ask:
Q3: Why is that belief/thought or unempowering story complete and utter B.S.? Why is it nothing more than something that belongs in the gutter with all the other trash we thow away?
Finally ask:
Q4: Why is the Opposite of what you used to believe the actual truth?
Why do you actually have enough money or resources or could find a way to make things happen? How do you know there has to be a way to get your body fit and that somewhere there is a model to follow that is not out there just to rip you off? How do you know that you are good enough as you are today without anybody else’s approval? How do you know that you have the same time as everyone else in the world and could model someone to do the thing that you want if you were willing to do instead of talk?
Write down 3 reasons why you KNOW that the opposite of what you used to believe is true.
Do this now while you’re in state. Don’t wait until later or tomorrow or after the meeting. Do it now. Ask yourself the question, take the time.
If that belief/story/thought/blame that you had really was Bull$#^@, and you just didn’t take the time to notice it – what could your life really be? What could you feel, experience, do and accomplish? How will you let your story’s next Act, Inning or 2nd half show?
Your time is now. The best time to have begun was 10 years ago. The 2nd best time is NOW, today, in the present moment.
God bless you.
Alex Beyer
http://www.StateStoryStrategy.com
Constant And Never-ending Improvement 